Bailout Sponsors

In light of the news that I now have a partial stake in AIG. I have a number of concerns that I'd like to bring up at the next shareholders meeting. For instance, if we are in such dire straits how come we still can afford to be a leading sponsor of one of the most expensive sports franchises in the world? As exhibited by star midfielder, and Manchester's resident douchebag, Cristiano Ronaldo our company even adorns the jersey of the Red Devils! Now, I'm willing to be reasonable here. I believe that we should maintain our sponsorship of Manchester United. Our influence over one of the English Premier League's flagship clubs presents many attractive marketing opportunities for our business. Seriously people, the opportunity for growth and expansion is overwhelming! However, as owners, I feel that we deserve a fair return on our investment in the Red Devils. For instance, we should have access to a luxury box. How are they going to fit 240 million of us in there? Can we take turns? If so, I would like a dozen tickets for Sunday's clash with Chelsea. Also, as a partial owner of AIG, I would like to have access to the personal cell phone numbers of the star players and their agents. This way I can get in contact with them to discuss business matters. I have this great ad campaign in my head with Ronaldo, Carloz Tevez, and Wayne Rooney that would be dynamite! I'm really looking forward to talking this over with them. It's amazing to think, that just a day ago I was a Liverpool and Arsenal fan! I hated Manchester United! Now, I'm a partial owner of their chief sponsor. This is exciting times people. Opportunities abound!